Eggs done right.

I was thinking the other day that I rarely, if ever, really enjoy eatings eggs out. Granted, unless I'm on vacation (which I recently was in Hawai'i -- more on that in a later post), I just don't go to the kind of place that would take the time to serve me eggs the way I like 'em. Don't get me wrong, I'm not necessarily knocking all the fine diners and breakfast spots out there. I just like my eggs (especially scrambled) done a particular way, and I prefer to forgo the eggs while out in favor of something more... healthy... how's that?

So without further ado, here are some tips on egg cookery.

Scrambled
First and foremost, learn to be patient. The pan should never, and I mean, never be on anything other than LOW heat. That's right, boys and girls, the perfect scrambled egg is one where the egg coagulates at a very slow pace. I've been know to spend 30 minutes or more sometimes on a batch of eggs for brunch.

Take your eggs and beat them. Now melt a pat of butter in a pan set on low heat, and add the eggs. Every so often, stir the eggs with a spatula. The pan should be low enough that there should be almost no noticeable coagulation in a pan of three eggs for over 10 minutes. Don't over stir either. You want large fluffy curds here. Once the eggs start to set up, add some cream or milk to the pan to make them even more smooth. Stir until almost set, then remove to a plate.

Keeping the eggs slightly runny is important here. Remember the old adage: eggs that are done in the pan are overdone on the plate.

As much as it's a pain in the bum to go through the trouble, you'll be rewarded with the most sublime scrambled eggs you've ever tried. And what's interesting is that they taste more "eggy" than scrambled eggs cooked too quickly.

Season the eggs to taste, and add some grated parmesan or even better, truffle bits (truffle oil works great too), for your decadent treat.

variation:
There's one version that cooks up really nicely if you want even more "egg" taste. I saw this technique a couple years back in a cooking magazine (no, I don't remember).

Using the same heat setting as above, add the eggs without beating them into the pan. You want to break the yolks and start mixing once the whites have started to set up. The texture is not as smooth as the original method, but it's got a nice and interesting taste. Try it sometime to change up your scramble game.

Fried Eggs

So, why does one need to be told how to fry an egg? Because there are a couple different ways to do it! And yes, there's even technique involved.

First things first. True "fried eggs" are just that... they're fried in oil, rather than heated in a pan with little or no grease. For a truly decadent experience, try rendering an in or two of lard and/or bacon fat in a pan, bring it up to temperature, and dropping a couple eggs straight from their shells into them. It's quick, and oh so tasty. At the point in which the eggs are immersed in the oil, they naturally cook more like an egg that's been flipped over so both sides are cooked. Again, with this kind of egg, don't overdo it. The point is to be able to sop up the yolk with a piece of bread (buttered rye for me please).

Wanna be a "fried egg" geek? Try this: Use a circle mold (or a tuna can with both ends cut off) to make perfectly round eggs. Better yet, if you're entertaining, take the time to not only use the mold, separate the yolk from the white, and gently place the yolk directly on the center of the egg once the whites are already starting to set. Beautiful!

Again, even with the standard pan fried egg, you want the pan to be on low heat. That way the egg has time to cook to the right consistency.

variation
How about this Japanese technique for pan fried egg? Take the egg and slowly pour it into a pan on low heat (get out that circle mold again!) then add a couple tablespoons of water in the pan, and put lid on it. This is a technique called steam frying. You'll end up with a much softer egg white with this method.

Hard...soft...semi...Boiled Eggs

Boiled eggs... We all have different tastes here for doneness, but here's a general guideline. Add eggs to a pot of cold water with about an inch or so water to cover. Bring to a boil and then remove from heat.

Leave the eggs in for 10-11 minutes, you'll get a perfect hard boiled egg.

Going down from there you can gauge the consistency of the egg you want. I like mine with a little more give in the yolk, so I usually take mine out around 7 minutes. Just take a bunch of eggs and try this. It's fun. You can get anything from a barely cooked egg all the way to a hard boiled with the yolk uniformly yellow. Just watch a clock or timer, and pull out the eggs after 5 minutes in one to two minute intervals, and then line them up, peel them after rinsing in cold water, and see what you like best.

Here's a tip on getting the yolk centered. Constantly roll the eggs back and forth while they're cooking with a spatula. This'll keep the yolks nice and centered... a must for Deviled eggs! Ok, even I don't bother with that. Get out a small glass (shot glass anyone), and just put it in the pot. Place egg, point side up, and voila! Yolks that are centered.

Of course there's much more in egg land, and I'm sure I will eventually write an entire entry on the omelet alone, but for the time being, hope your egg cooking skills will be better.

Since I actually made all three kinds of eggs simultaneously to write this entry... what did I do with them? Why make an Egg Egg Egg and Cheese Sandwich.


Egg Egg Egg and Cheese Sandwich

Per Sandwich

1 Croissant

1 boiled egg
1 fried egg
2 scrambled eggs (optional drizzle at end with truffle oil)

Cheese -- can be anything you like.
I used grated parmesan, aged white cheddar, and 5 year-old gouda for mine.

Salt and pepper to taste.

Once you have all three kinds of eggs, open up a toasted croissant, add the cheese (melt if desired during toasting), top with the eggs, salt and pepper to taste, and then chomp in. This is a wonderful way of tasting all the different textures and flavors that the eggs have in one dish. It's a bit messy (fried egg runs all over), but it's GOOD!

Happy Cooking and Eating!