Lunch at Central Michel Richard

DC had to redeem itself. My previous venture into a food adventure (read previous posting) just sucked, and I desperately needed to eat good food lovingly prepared (no offense Jose, I love McCormick & Schmick's, but eating 6 meals in a row there at the bar while you work does get old after a while). I've heard quite a bit about Chef Michel Richard, and thought I'd give his new ode to an American style bistro a go, since at this late juncture, I wasn't about to get a same-day reservation at his flagship restaurant Citronelle, in Georgetown.

I called up the restaurant and asked if reservations were required for lunch, and was told that they were highly recommended and that although they do allow walk-ins, that there's a chance we wouldn't get seated. When I asked the host-zilla what time during the lunch hour would be the best to try, she told me in not so many words to go do unspeakable things to myself. Well, no, she actually said, "well, it depends, sir, if you really want to eat here, please make a reservation." click

Hrm... I guess if the rumors of the chef being a class A A-hole were to be believed, i shouldn't be surprised that he has a host-zilla answering the phone. Nevermind. Opentable.com... oh, 1:30, that works. Click, click There, biyotch, I have a res, AND I get points towards a future discount at a restaurant of my choice. Take that!

I decided to take a female dining companion with me since Jose decided that work was more important (ok, that's not fair, I guess) whom I was told could "put it down." Alrighty, bring it on!

First impression after announcing myself to nondescript queeny host(ess)... Ok, nice space, airy, glass, light wood. Nice. Bar area looks too simple and haphazard, but ok.

Host(ess) comes to get us in a couple minutes and we're off to our table. Bread comes. Yum... crusty French rustic bread with softened butter. We look through the rather truncated lunch menu (damn, I can't have the Gougeres, or the 72-hour beef rib?) and decide on a couple appetizers to share, and on some entrees.

Asian Style Ahi Carpaccio: Lovely to look at. A plate of perfectly round paper-thin slices of raw ahi just lightly salted and topped with a dice of red onion and chives. Great taste. The fish was screamingly fresh, and the texture was heavenly. It wasn't over seasoned, and there was just the right amount of oil to lubricate the palate but not detract from the star which was the ahi. I thought the yellow slices on top were preserved lemon rind, but upon closer inspection, it was a julienne of Takuan, a Japanese daikon radish pickle that's slightly sweet. Ah... Asian, right? All in all, flawless. No complaints here.

Duck Rilletes and Faux-gras Terrine: The rilletes were to die for. Meaty, chunky, a little fatty. Definitely the stuff to make a French man cry. Paired with the Shiraz (yay, a Big Serving!!!) it was just breathtaking. The Faux-Gras was sinfully flavorful, and had the texture of whipped butter. Ok, maybe this place does deserve to have Cerberus guarding the gate.

I got the Crab Cake, and my companion opted for the Lamb Shank. Both were stellar. The crab cake was served over leeks that had the maionnaise worked in (fresh, not Kraft, of course), and was just chunks of crab meat barely bound and pan seared. The crunch came from etherial fried ribbons of carrot and beet. Mmmmm yum. Good crab cake.

The shank was definitely sous-vide cooked. It fell apart and was spoon tender but the meat was completely red, looking almost rare. Again, served with creamy cheesy polenta and fried onions with some rosemary-herb brown sauce... it was wonderful.

Entrees completed, my companion actually went back to finish the bit of appetizers that were left... and then ordered dessert. Ok, can I have that metabolism, please!

She got the signature dessert called the Kit Kat Bar. It comes out looking like a giant Kit Kat. It's a cocoa-dusted ganache served over a praline crust that once you eat, truly tastes like it's a Kit Kat bar, if one were served elevated into the stratosphere.

Damn, that was some good eating. If you can, go.

It's pricey, but not overly so. We ended up getting a bill for two glasses of wine, an app each, an entree each, dessert, and coffee for $120.

And I felt so bad for Jose having to work, that I brought him a quarter of the crab cake just so he could get a taste.

Central Michel Richard
1001 Pennsylvania Ave, NW Washington, DC
Tel:202.626.0015
www.centralmichelrichard.com

Happy Eating!

Disappointement at Les Halles DC

As you all can tell, I'm a foodie. I love to eat and cook and think and live food. As that kind of person, I LOVE Anthony Bourdain. I've read all his books, have the Les Halles Cookbook, and watch his shows on tee-vee whenever I can catch them. So, I was delighted to actually be in a city and have the time to venture into a Les Halles location.

Although I doubt that I set my expectations too high, what I ended up getting was one of the sigularly most disappointing dining experiences of my life.

I walked down to the restaurant on Pennsylvania Avenue from my friend's place on Thomas Circle, thinking I'd eat a couple courses as an early dinner. Since it was 5:30 PM, there was almost no one in the restaurant, which was fine by me. The server comes over, greets me (Bonjour!), and I order a glass of Medoc to start. (Un verre de medoc, s'il vous plait!) The glass comes, and I'm already apprehensive that I'm paying 12 bucks for what looks to be a tasting serving (literally three sips, max).

I look through the menu (like I didn't know it pretty much by heart by now), and decide to get the Mini Tartare de Boeuf, prepared tableside. Hey, I love my theatrics, leave me alone.

Another waitress comes over (Bonjour!) and asks me how I'd like the tartare prepared. I responded by telling her to make it a tad on the spicy side, but other than that, to make it the way she thought was the best. It took her about 7 minutes of mixing egg with various condiments (pepper, tabasco, worcestershire, etc) with the fresh beef before she scooped the tartare and arranged it oh so prettily on a plate with some toast points and a mesclun salad.

I take a bite anticipating a little corner of heaven... Ok, not bad. Competent, but definitely not nearly in the same league as the Kobe Tartare that I had at craftSteak in Vegas several months ago. Still, nice. Then I made the mistake of taking a bite of the salad... Ok, did the garde-manger fall asleep or what? The thing must have been salted at least three times. It was so salty that it burned my mouth. I gagged on it, and then lost the use of my palate for the next 10 minutes. So much for enjoying steak tartare. I'm a little pissed at this point, but I finish the tartare and leave the rest of the salad on the plate as a mini-protest for ruining my mini-tartare.

So, fine, I feel jipped on the wine, and can't taste anything yet. Let's refresh the palate by guzzling water, wine, then eating a piece of (stale) baguette. Ok, better.

I ended up getting the Mignons de Porc, since it is one of their signature dishes, and since I've actually made it from the cookbook. I wanted to see how mine stacked up to the original. Pork comes... it's tepid? Ok waitron. You've got three tables in an empty restaurant and I get cold-ish food? Well, whatever, I'll eat it anyway. Like I said, I've made this recipe... it starts out by making garlic confit (fancy way of saying slow roasted garlic) and then rubbing two pork tenderloins with it and leaving it overnight. Instead of confit, I got burnt. Basically, the pork and the sauce just tasted burnt. The sauce itself was fine (basic brown jus-glace-whatever type thing)but I couldn't get over the burnt garlic flavor. My rendition of the recipe was sublime by comparison. I gagged on the meat, ate a couple bites of the very boring mash (gluey!), and paid the bill.

All in all, the worst $50 I've ever spent on a bill short of being gouged for bad buurgers and fries at the Mouse Trap (sorry, don't want to get sued by a certain animation and entertainment company).

Les Halles DC... maybe it's time to close your doors, since ya ain't giving a sh*t about what you're serving. I got a drop of wine, a salt lick, and piece of charcoal for 50 bucks. I will never go back. Ok, I'll try the Park Avenue location, maybe.


Les Halles, DC
1201 Pennsylvania Ave.
Washington, DC
Tel: 202.347.6848
www.leshalles.net/washington.php

Happy Eating!